Well actually it is the night before the night before surgery. But it is my last night at home. A friend called who has walked this path before me and was exactly what I needed. She made me laugh. I have known her since I was 5 years old. She is wonderfully funny and is always able to put things in perspective. When she had breast cancer she didn't miss a beat. She was in treatment and back to work without anyone even knowing. What an amazing woman. I still have in the back of my mind that whole thing about feeling like I have been hit by a train. Well, my friend would just expect to stare that train down and have it stop in its tracks.
Another friend told me that I would be coming home to the same life, the same family, the same friends that I am leaving. That was also just what I needed to hear. There was a very strong part of me that felt like I was marching off to my death. Okay, so maybe I have obsessed a bit too much on all the risks of surgery. I would list them, but that would just be way too entertaining. Well, I do worry about losing a tooth..... but as long as they pull that tube straight out I should be okay.
Tubes....tubes down my throat, tubes to pee through, tubes to drain my wounds. Lots of tubes. Luckily I will be asleep when they insert these things. Oh, at least I think I will be asleep. The pulling out of the tubes, not so much. I will get to be a party to that and will let you know exactly what that is like.
I am ready!!
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