Today I woke up to find several very nice comments on my blog. Thank you!! I am understanding what it means to have support from people who have traveled this road before me. You really can understand the emotional rollercoaster I am riding right now. Most of the time I can block out my surgery, but not for long. A friend described it as "all consuming". She was right.
For me "all consuming" is the planning that goes along with being away from my children, my home, my work (I am self-employed); getting my paperwork all in order from insurance approvals, to medical treatments forms signed for my kids, to updating my will and power-of-attorney, to creating lists for my wonderful sister-in-law who will come and stay with my kids; to planning ahead for meals and setting the house up for recovery.
This last item is tough. We built our home seven years ago with an open concept. It's great, but if you aren't feeling well then there isn't any place to go where it is quiet and dark without going to your bedroom. I was sick a few weeks ago and felt awful. I decided to rest in a recliner in our living room. Oh, the noise. There really isn't any way to shut it out. So I did go upstairs to my bedroom to rest, but then I felt like I was locked away and very isolated from everyone. I will have to ask Teri about this. Since she is living the recovery as I type this. I can't tell you just how helpful it is to have someone who is two months ahead of you on this road to significantly reducing our breast cancer risk.
I am one day closer and feel much more connected and even more secure in my decision today. Teri's friends and aunt who commented on my post yesterday really gave me a boost. Thanks again!!