May love and laughter light your days, and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours, wherever you may roam.
May peace and plenty bless your world with joy that long endures.
May all life's passing seasons bring the best to you and yours!
~ Robert Frost


Welcome to my blog. This is my story of how I faced my risk of breast cancer, the decisions I made, the support I received and my week by week recovery from surgery. I chose to have a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy with immediate DIEP reconstruction at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston (March 2010). For more information on my 'Medical Team' please see tab above. I also have a wonderful circle of friends who have supported me throughout. They have provided us with lots of delicious meals and desserts. Many of those recipes are included above under "Feed the Flap" recipes. "Feed the Flap" is a term I coined when trying to increase my abdominal (fat) flap to ensure that I was a good candidate for the DIEP procedure. This was not something recommended by any medical professional, it was just something that made sense to me. I think it worked!! Feel free to join me on this journey and feel free to post comments.

Select the tabs on the left side marked Week 1, Week 2, Week 3..... to go immediately to the surgical/recovery part of this blog.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Week 3 - Day 3

Today my post is dedicated to Mike, the unsung hero in all of this. This week I am looking at how life is different now. Again, most of the changes are subtle, but this particular one isn't quite so subtle. I can no longer look at my husband without seeing and feeling the love he has for me. Anyone who knows me knows that I have always shared that Mike is the most wonderful husband in the world, because he cooks, cleans, does laundry, takes great care of our girls, but he is so much more. He is genuinely caring, loving, tender, patient and gentle. Those are just the words I can come up with, there are other qualities that I just can't wrap words around.

During all of this he never waivered or made me hurry up with my decision or persuaded me in any way, he is caring is such an unassuming way. Protective even. The night in the hospital when he pulled the plugs off the machine I was hooked up to and got me into the bathroom is one thing I will never forget. He knows exactly what to do when I am in need!!! He has had to strip and clean my drains since leaving the hospital, he has been so gentle when doing this. It's really tough for me since the drain is coming out of MY body, but I don't have to worry that he is going to pull on it and cause me pain. When I am achy or tired or simply lazy he carries all the weight. He gets the girls dinner, gets them ready for bed, reads to them, then takes care of me, my drains, my bed (my pillows have to be just right for proper sleeping!). Over the years I have certainly tested his patience, but the depth of his patience seems unending. Right now he is living with 3 needy girls. AND he is hanging in there.

When you get married you don't always realize just how important that decision is until you are tested. Is this the person you can trust to walk you to the bathroom in your johnny? Is this the person who will endure night after night on a cot when he could be staying in a first class hotel? Is this the person who won't leave your side in the recovery room so that he can get something to eat after a very long night of waiting for you to come out of surgery? Is this the person who gives you backrubs when his back is the one that really needs it? Is this the person who gives you the last piece of his favorite pie? Is this the person who will take six weeks off from work to make sure that you are doing what you need to do to recover? Is this the person who will go out and get you new milk after you take a sip of milk from March 31st and it's now April 10th? Is this the person who can laugh with you when you are being dramatic or silly? Is this the person you can trust with your worries and fears? Is this the person you want to sit with on an old porch watching the sun set? When I look at Mike I can say, "YES!" to each and every one of these questions. I hope that I am never tested, but if I am I certainly have a great and caring role model. Again, my gratitude to his mom. He is my unsung hero. He doesn't get the cards or the flowers or the hugs or the phone calls. But he did have a friend come over to get him out to go golfing!!! And what a difference that made!!

"Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."

1 comment:

rissawrites said...

Yeah Mike!

You are a hero. How wonderful you both are to have each other. Your children are truly blessed.

Enjoy the golfing.

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